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Meeting Your Kids Where They Are: The One Shift That Changed Everything

Meeting Your Kids Where They Are: The One Shift That Changed Everything

Why understanding your kid beats trying to fix them—every time.

Geoffrey Griffin
April 21, 2025

Focused Content

Fatherhood isn’t just about showing up—it’s about knowing how to show up when it matters most.
And let’s be honest: some days, that’s a moving target.

One kid is melting down.
Another is cruising through life like it’s a vacation.
And you? You’re somewhere between proud, confused, and wondering if that third cup of coffee counts as a coping strategy.

In this edition of The Focused Fool, we’re leaning into a question every dad faces:
What does it actually look like to meet your kids where they are?
(Not where you wish they were.)

Inside today’s issue:

A reflection on the mindset shift that changed my parenting for good
3 practical connection tools you can use even on your most exhausted days
A question that opens up conversations when your kid is struggling
And curated insights—from Stoicism to Kidpreneurs—that challenge what it means to raise strong, capable humans

Because presence beats perfection. And connection starts with curiosity.

Let’s dig in.

Focused Purpose

You love your kids more than anything—
So why does it sometimes feel like you're failing them?

When one kid struggles despite trying hard, and another coasts with ease, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparison, control, or quiet frustration.

This isn’t about parenting perfectly.
It’s about learning to see each child clearly—
Not as who you wish they were,
But as who they actually are.

Inside:
– The mindset shift that changed everything for me
– The trap most dads fall into without realizing it
– 3 practical ways to connect with your kids today (even if you’re exhausted)

Focused Insights

Curated recommendations to challenge your thinking, inspire action, or simply make you pause and reflect.

The Daily Stoic
“What Does It Mean to Be Wealthy”
Becoming Minimalist
“35 Gifts Your Children Will Never Forget”
OKDork - Noah Kagan
“A Few Thoughts on Suffering”

Focused Partners

Is pushing kids to get good grades the fastest way to raise successful children?

Surprisingly, the answer is NO.

Focusing solely on academics makes up just a small part of what truly nurtures a child's self-belief and independence.

So what's the real game changer in raising unstoppable kids?

It’s all about getting them to learn critical life skills.

Did you know skills like problem-solving, creativity, financial literacy and resilience make the difference between those who succeed and those who struggle later in life?

This is way more impactful than just pushing for good grades.

Unfortunately, many parents waste hundreds of dollars every month on tutors and academic programs focusing only on rote learning.

While adding tremendous amounts of stress to young kids.

Smart parents are discovering this simple solution to spark their child's fire for self-driven achievement, raising confident leaders fast.

Focused Action

Every month, The Focused Fool brings you a series of Focused Actions—practical, bite-sized steps designed to help you grow as a father, husband, and man. Each month follows a specific theme, broken down into 12 structured actions (3 per week) that build on each other over the course of the month.

These actions are designed to be simple, achievable, and impactful, helping you establish new habits, strengthen relationships, and refine your personal leadership. Whether you follow the entire series or just a few steps, each action is a stepping stone toward becoming the man you want to be.

This month’s theme: Presence—Building intentional time with your kids and spouse.

Express Appreciation

Action: Verbally acknowledge something you genuinely appreciate about your spouse or child.
Prompt: Notice their reaction and reflect on how appreciation strengthens connection.

Focused Wonder

Focused questions designed to spark meaningful dialogue—whether at the dinner table, during a car ride, or at bedtime. Use these questions to build trust, curiosity, and laughter in your relationships.

If your child is struggling with a task I try asking them:

What is the hardest part of this for you right now?

And follow up with:

What are you telling yourself about this?